Patrick J. Sauer Online

Last summer, the wifey and I stayed at the Belton Chalet, a fantastic historic hotel just outside the Glacier National Park (Yes, the glaciers are melting, so book a room today!)

The Belton Chalet is an old railroad lodge that got abandoned after World War II and was presumably haunted by ghosts until an enterprising couple sank a bunch of cash into and it reopened a decade ago.

It's got a killer restaurant, the famous Red Jammer Buses drop off/pick up just outside the lobby, and the spacious balconies are ideal for putting up the dogs, and sipping on a Moose Drool while spying for wildlife. I didn't see any moose drooling, or standing tall doing nothing for that matter, but we did see a bear shaking a tree, so good enough for Glacier. If you're headed up yonder, hunker down at the Belton Chalet. Trust me, I know from hunkerin' down. 

My latest post at AOL Small Biz is about the WowTowel, which is a 53 square-foot loop cotton towel with pockets in the corners and a hole in the middle for an umbrella.

I know what you're thinking, WOW!

You are not alone. It's against corporate overlord policy to say how many views the story got, suffice to say it's the blue whale of beach industry innovation blog posts. A lot of sunbathers surfing the web before surfing the surf. The piece has a whopping 90 comments and counting...

Let's be honest, it's nice to hear some good news about the beach, no? (That's some awesome spillage, right there, UCB.) Have fun at the shore, now available without all that untenable sand!

Dad, Skype, St. Paddy's Day and a arseload of Patricks make us Father/Son Celtic cyber warriors.

Who says old people can't handle modern technology? Those naysayers can Póg mo Thóin. We're world record holders. Click right here for the video evidence.

Read on for more of the incredible St. Patrick's Day Show with records like "Most Party Hats Worn," "Most Bench Presses of a Live Dog" and "Largest Nose Flute Orchestra."

(And if you missed my first go-round with Little Kim the Sauer Muppet, have at it.)

(Ed note: Well, that was quick. "Read it Like A Man" didn't bring in the web traffic and died a short happy life. What gives, chickees? Too much literary mind-blowing for you too handle? No? Whatever. Eggheads. Click here to read installments 1-4. Back to the blog...)

"You can try to drown us, and you can pour oil all over us, but the soul of New Orleans lives on in its music and it's people," Quint Davis, Jazz Fest Grand Poobah.

I just returned from a second Jazz Fest taking place while the gulf region suffers through another devastating man-made disaster. Living it up while folks drown in oil brings on its own slightly guilt-inducing cognitive dissonance, but the party-to-keep-from-weeping-ethos is ingrained in New Orleans, and who are we to question civic responsibility?

The weekend was best summed up by Kate Speakes of the "Pussyfooters," a group of well-cleaveged burlesque-y pro-chick parade-marchers. (For the uninitiated, they aren't strippers, they're professional party-goers in frilly skimpy corset thingees; Par for the crawfish bread down there.) At a Mardi Gras World party, Speakes implored me to spread the word that BPs corporate malfeasance is doing ungodly damage to the (often family-owned) fishing and shrimping industry, to the protective wetlands that were starting to regenerate after Katrina, and to the well-being of all kinds of wildlife, including a bird sanctuary created by Teddy Roosevelt back when "conservative" stood for conservation and not "Drill, Baby, Drill." 

Passing along the dire word is the absolute least I could do for a region that has brought me such love and happiness over the years. Don't let Eddie Vedder be the only one screaming out at this massive ecological for-profit f*ck-up. It's not much, and Lord knows if it helps, but maybe you could take a second and sign this petition, or drive past the BP station and go to...Exxon? Yikes. 

Yet again, hopes, prayers, karmic vibes and best wishes to the gulf region.

In NOLA solidarity, why not read one of the great Big Easy books in the latest Blisstree "Read it Like A Man" series? It's not like you have a job to go to.